If I focus only on what I don’t have, what sadness of a life that would be. Moment to moment, aiming for that just beyond reach. Some things have to be of course: a little frustration and a failure here and there keeps one motivated to stand up again after tripping on pride, vanity, or hubris. Whatever my virtues are, these vices prove a constant source for self-improvement.
Combat against my vices have been especially tough of late. Discipline has been lacking – where motivation fails, discipline has to pick up the slack. But when discipline is also absent, then I get what I have been all summer long: a rather slumping slide towards utter inactivity and nil for achievements worth mentioning. Things have been getting better of late, but I can do better still.
I’ve been saying goodbye a lot lately. Mostly to things and objects which I have used as sources of indulgence over these past months. Games, snacks, the occasional side-quest life makes available. Just a few things left here or there. The journey up the hill becomes easier the more weights we remove. I have to find comfort in the movement, should I choose to abandon comfort in the sedentary.
Would have been fun to have you around for the journey. We’d make good life journey companions from what I’ve seen. But hey, that’s the thing about traveling, sometimes people don’t wind up heading in the same direction. I hold out hope our roads will intersect again before too long, but unlike my vices, some things are harder to get a grasp on. Let’s hope then: it doesn’t cost so much between the tired steps along the upward tracks to hope. Bigger miracles have happened – I’m merely asking for a minor unlikelihood.